How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
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