They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
