that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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