NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
