3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Randomize
