Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize