I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
now i know why i became what i already was.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
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