Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
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