Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
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