the new term for farting is butt boxing.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Randomize
