hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Randomize
