Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
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