Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
Randomize
