My room smells like vodka and shame
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
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