The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
