i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize
