idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
