I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
The power of my boobs compel you
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
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