More tranny stories later!
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
