i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
Randomize
