she asked me if the dress made her look fat, i told her no - the fat made her look fat.
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
Randomize
