Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
i haven't been laid since the bush administration. it's frustrating.
Some advice for success: 1) Go ugly early, it saves you time and money; 2) If you can't pork a princess, pound a pig for practice; and 3) Beauty is only a light switch away.
ur like the dr phil of bizarro world.
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize