Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
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