You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
