i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
Randomize
