so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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