Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
