So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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