i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
Randomize
