Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
Randomize
