Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
