So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
