The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Randomize
