Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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