i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Randomize
