What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
