fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
