Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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