I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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