All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
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