i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
Randomize
