I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
Randomize
