hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
Randomize
