what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
Randomize
