I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
Randomize
