I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
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