I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Randomize
