he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
People with herpes should wear stickers.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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