More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Randomize
