i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
