Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
how do flat chested girls get laid?
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize
